I recently found an online support chat room for bereaved parents. I was nervous at first that they might not consider me a bereaved parent since all of my children were lost during pregnancy. This fear has proven to be very wrong. They have accepted me with open arms. If fact, I've felt so welcome that I have attended every single chat since Friday night for a total of 12 chats so far!
Journaling and blogging come up regularly as it is a very healthy way of dealing with the emotions that come with losing a child. Last night, the journal topic "We Are Not Alone" came up.
It's an interesting statement. We're not alone because so many others are also hurting. It sucks. I love the support, but hate that anyone (myself included) needs the support. It hurts that I'm not alone because I know the pain they feel.
Yet, at the same time, we are alone. Very alone. No one can fill the void in our hearts. Not even having another baby will make me miss Dominic, Gwen, Aiden, and Jill any less.
I am alone in my specific grief. I have support, yes. But no one, not even Chris misses my babies like I do.
***DISCLAIMER: That does not mean I think he hurts or misses them any less. He just hurts differently.***