About Us

My photo
United States
We were married on September 27, 2009. We began our journey more than three years ago. We have had four losses to date and are still trying to conceive our sticky bean.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

Due Dates and adoption

Based on EDD's (estimated due dates) I should have an almost 4 year old (in Oct), a 3 year old (next week), a 2 year old (in less than a month), and an 8 month old (tomorrow).

I hate July. It's one of those months that provides a strong reminder of what I'm not allowed to have for whatever reason. I know we're working toward adoption, ever-so-slowly, but it's not the same.

Do I doubt that I'll love the adopted child any less? Not at all. I've always wanted to adopt. In fact, I wanted to adopt LONG before I decided I wanted biological children. It's more the fact of knowing that my genes will never be carried on, nor will my husband's. I will never create a life that gets to live outside of my womb. I will never feel a baby kick inside me. I won't feel those first bouts of the hiccups. I'll never have my water break. There are just so many things you cannot do with an adopted child that you could with a biological child during those first 9 months of the baby's existence. I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss that.