About Us

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We were married on September 27, 2009. We began our journey more than three years ago. We have had four losses to date and are still trying to conceive our sticky bean.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Left behind?

Every few months or so on my RPL support board, we go through a changeover of sorts. It usually consists of a number of members getting pregnant. In my experience, when several conceive at the same time they almost always go on the get their rainbows together. Of course with new babies the members start posting less and less. (And who can blame them?) Occasionally a member will come back with occasional updates or even to rejoin the board as a ray of hope to the remaining ladies.

Usually around the time of the BFP boom we also undergo an influx of new member. This is what is happening now. We've had three new members this past week. I can't help looking at the board and wondering if once again, I'm going to be left behind. I've lost count at the number of women that have gotten their rainbow since I joined. Heck, I've lost count of the number of women that have gotten more than one rainbow. All the while, I sit back and smile and wish them the best. I am happy for them and am truly glad they are getting their miracles; but it doesn't change the fact that I want so badly to join them and am still so unsure that I ever will.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011


I am reposting a friend's blog post with permission. If you would like to visit her blog, you may do so here

This is not one of my typical posts since moving over to here. but its something I need to say, to share. Because I can relate in some small way. Because we once needed the hero.

I can still remember the day we were told Joey needed a Bone Marrow Transplant. And the thought that crossed my mind was “will there be a match?”

I was terrified. I help my breath. Melanie was tested. I felt so defeated when the results showed she was not a match. More tests… more waiting.

When I first called and there were “no matches yet, but some possibilities” I was scared. I was always afraid that a call would come that they just had no match for him.

Then the call came. I hit the floor, crying. I was in the laundromat when they informed me he had a donor. I can not tell you the feeling of being told your child has a hero.

Please, heroes are needed every day. Every child deserves the best chance to grow up they can get. I am asking, are you willing to be that hero? Are you willing to help save a child?

I ask because there are children whose lives hang in the balance, whose lives depend on a complete stranger giving a selfless gift, marrow. Children like Austin who need a match and don’t have one. Please, today, register as a donor. Register today and help save children like Austin. Give this family the chance our family was given… you will never regret being a hero… I am eternally grateful to Joey’s donor, and I write her letters, praying one day to thank her in person.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Change of tone

Within a few weeks the content of my blog will be changing some. I'll still talk about our angels, but the ttc aspect will no longer be here. We are done with medical assistance after tomorrow. If tomorrow's IUI does not work, we will be moving to adoption and that will be my main focus here. If it DOES work, then hallelujah I'll get to talk about pregnancy fears.

Today, I've already killed my phone battery. I had to call and cancel a job for tomorrow because of the IUI. I then called on some adoption options and of course called Chris at work to discuss it all. I have another call to make and hope to be sharing more details soon.