Taboo

***Note: "You" in this blog is not a direct hit at anyone but rather a generalization of the public view.***


Why is pregnancy loss such a taboo subject? Why can't I talk about my kids? Because it makes you uncomfortable? Really, if this is the only reason you can give me, I have to say, I don't give a damn about your comfort.

One would think, given that I am going through fertility testing I would be allowed to talk about my angels. Yet, time and time again I am made to feel as if the subject is taboo. Even my husband clams up anytime our angels are brought up.

I am sick and tired of being made to feel as though my babies don't count. I am timed of not being allowed to talk about them. I am fed up with acting as if everything is ok. I am done.

I know by my not talking about them you can pretend they never existed. I know that nobody wants to hear about when I was pregnant, about my craving, about my morning sickness, or even my tender breasts. But why not? Is my experience somehow less important because my child isn't here with me?

Would you tell a mother who lost her child to cancer or in an accident not to talk about her child because it makes you uncomfortable? Would you want her to box those memories of the short time she had with her child and not share them No, you wouldn't. You'd want her to share. You'd want her to remember. Why should it be any different for me? Why should I have to be silent about the short time I had my angels here with me?