About Us

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We were married on September 27, 2009. We began our journey more than three years ago. We have had four losses to date and are still trying to conceive our sticky bean.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Missing out

I love my niece. I really do. It has been an amazing 16 months watching her personality develop and seeing the joy in her face when she learns something new. As much joy as she brings to my life, she brings some pain as well.

I am jealous of her mother. My sister was not at all ready for a child. Niecelet's father is much less than ideal. In fact, he hasn't even seen her since Christmas.

She's also a reminder. Aiden would be four months older than Niecelet. Watching her grow up and do new things is a reminder of what he would be able to do already. She's already pairing words together to make mini-sentences "See dat?" "Did dat." "Da! Ca!" (Dad! [gpa] Cat!) She's running, jumping, playing hide and seek, spinning herself in circles until she is incapable of standing...and these are just her new things. I will never get to see Aiden (or Dominic, or Gwen, or Jill) do any of it and it hurts. :(


  1. ((hugs)) I know what that feels like. It's hard to watch my best friend's daughter sometimes.

  2. HUGS. It's really hard to see my *very much loved* baby cousins for this same reason.